I did something Friday night that is really out of character for me.
I did something ALONE.
If you know me, I can be pretty independent but when it comes to going and doing things (unless it is shopping or a trip to Walmart or something), I NEVER do things alone. And I think for a while now, that never-do-anything-alone thing has kind of defined my life a little.
When I was younger, I'm pretty sure I was as close to a shadow for my sister as you could get. Whatever she did, I wanted to do. Unless it had a dramatic ending like GA camp, and then I was out.
As I got older, I always had something to do with someone. Whether is was putt-putt golf or a get-together at someone's house or the movies or dinner with a boyfriend, I always had something to do and someone to do it with.
When I moved to Birmingham, away from friends and family, I basically had to start life all over again. That meant making new friends and finding my way around this new city. People have told me that I'm good at making friends. I tend to disagree. I'm good at making aquaintences when the opportunity presents itself, but establishing relationships and keeping those relationships has been something that I've had to learn how to do again since I've moved here.
(I'm by no means at a lack for friends here. I just realized that this post is starting to make me sound like a no-friends loser, but bare with me. I have a point.)
With my job being as time-consuming as it is, and with friends not always being available to do things whenever I can (and vice-versa), I've struggled with the fact that there are things that I miss out on because my time is very limited.
But lately, I've discovered a newfound sense of pride in myself and a go-get 'em attitude. So, I decided the heck with it, the next thing that comes along that I want to do, I'm doing it whether I have a buddy to tag along or not.
I have a friend who works at the Red Mountain Theatre Company in downtown Birmingham, and she is always raving about their shows. (I'm sure it has nothing to do with the fact that she is the public relations/marketing director and that is her job. Absolutely nothing.) There have been several shows there that I've wanted to see but haven't for lack of money or friend to go with.
This weekend was the last run of The Drowsy Chaperone and I've always wanted to see it. This was my last chance. Everyone I'd want to take with me either was working or lived three hours away. So, I decided to bite the bullet and go by myself. Besides, Nicole would be there working and I'd at least get to see her smiling face on the way in and out.
I could not have made a better decision. The show was incredible and the night was perfect.
And as I sat there in the audience, I realized how great it is to be a lover of the theatre. There is something about going to a show that sucks you in a takes you away. As soon as the house lights go down and the stage lights go up, you are instantly transported to another time and another place. (Cue Sandi Patty and Wayne Watson)
The characters on the stage become more than just characters. If they are good at their job, you immediately connect with them and they become life-long friends of yours. You laugh when they laugh. You cry when they cry.
I could not have had a better time this weekend on my first big outing alone. It was nice, for a change, to go enjoy something by myself without having to worry about what the other person with me wanted to do next.
I've often questioned God on why he has kept me single for so long. I've touched on the main reason - he wants me to want Him more than I want anything else. The other reason? I think he's wanted me to learn how to enjoy life by myself.
And I am.